Regarding Steve Pearlstein: Sometimes I adore him, and then again, sometimes I despise him. This is one of the times when I love him.

(A copy of the following top-secret memorandum was recently obtained from a senior White House official. Its authenticity could not be confirmed.)
TO: Director/National Clandestine Service/CIA
FROM: Chief of Station/Lagos, Nigeria

RE: Results of Interrogation of Exxon Mobil CEO

Above-named subject, Rex W. Tillerson, was apprehended while disembarking at Lagos airport and brought to Covert Interrogation Center #7. After a cocktail of Sodium Pentothal and Desoxyn was administered, subject suffered some disorientation but was able to answer questions on oil and gasoline pricing and company finances submitted by FTC/DOE/DOJ joint task force, pursuant to presidential directive of 26 April. Water-boarding proved unnecessary.

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